The Stoic Maou and the Wimpy Sanzo Priest?
by gwendal738
Summary: Genjyo Sanzo and Yuuri Shibuya exchange places! Sanzo signing paperwork? Yuuri fighting demons? What's going on, and who's behind all of these? Furthermore, how will the two separate worlds cope with it? KKMSaiyuki crossover DISCONTINUED
1. Chapter 1

A/N: And I am back once again! I decided to try something new, so I present to you a KKM/Saiyuki crossover! I hope you like it… Anyway, please read and review!

**The Stoic Maou and the Wimpy Sanzo Priest?**

It was a normal day for the Sanzo-ikkou. They were riding around Togenkyou in their jeep in order to get to the west and accomplish their mission, when suddenly a huge band of demons swarmed in front of their jeep. All the occupants of the jeep got out and yawned, as this was another usual routine.

"Ah, I'm so hungry…" Goku whined.

"Shut up, stupid monkey, and just fight the demons!" Gojyo shouted.

"Who are you calling stupid monkey, you perverted water sprite cockroach?!" Goku retorted. Sanzo hit them both with his harisen before the 'fight' between them got worse.

"Shut up, you fools, and fight the demons or I'll kill you!" Sanzo scolded.

They then got to work. Hakkai was hitting demons with his chi, Gojyo was standing in the middle stabbing them with his shakujo, Goku was running around hitting demons with his nyoi-bou, while Sanzo was shooting them senseless with his shoreijyu. The group of demons was almost completely exterminated when a huge stream of light came out from nowhere, blinding everyone for a minute. When everybody regained their eyesight, Hakkai noticed that Sanzo was gone!

"Gojyo, Goku, where is Sanzo?" Hakkai asked the two.

"I don't know, wasn't he just standing there shooting demons?" They then turned to the now small group of demons, who were rubbing their eyes.

"You! What did you do to Sanzo?" Gojyo asked angrily while grabbing the demon's collar.

"Huh? How should I know? One time you were completely killing us, the next a blinding light came from nowhere. How should I know where that monk went if I can't even see a thing?"

"You do have a point, but still… You have to die." Gojyo then stabbed him and the remaining demons with his shakujo. They then began to search for Sanzo.

* * *

Meanwhile, in another alternate world called Shin Makoku, a loud voice calling a certain Maou can be heard around the hallways of Blood Pledge Castle. Günter was again looking for an always missing Yuuri Shibuya to resume their lessons.

"Heika! Heika! We need to study! Where are you, heika?!"

Yuuri was hiding behind the fountain in the garden when someone tapped him on the shoulder. He jumped and sighed in relief when he saw Conrad.

"Heika, Günter's calling you." Conrad greeted with a smile on his face.

"Conrad! Please hide me… Anywhere! Oh, and stop calling me heika."

"But Yuuri, I really think you should start studying with Günter so that you can learn a lot of things about this world."

"But I don't want to!" He then ran behind the fountain again when he saw Günter approach in his direction.

"Conrart, have you seen heika?"

"Why yes! He's… uhh… In the library!"

When Günter ran in the direction of the library, Yuuri emerged from his hiding place and thanked Conrad. He was just beginning to run in the opposite direction when Günter came running to him.

"Heika! There you are. We should really continue our lessons."

A sullen Yuuri was then pulled by an overjoyed Günter to the direction of the library.

"Günter, how did you know I was not in the library?"

"You would never go there on your own will, heika, because that's where we hold our lessons." Günter replied with a smile. Just then, the same blinding stream of light that appeared in Togenkyou appeared before them, therefore blinding them temporarily. When Günter recovered a few minutes later, he found out that he was holding the hand… of a very irate looking blonde haired man who was rubbing his temple. He quickly let go and brought out his sword.

"Who are you, and what have you done to heika?!"

"Huh? What heika? And who the hell are you? Where is this place?"

"It would be polite to introduce yourself first, kidnapper!"

"Who are you calling a kidnapper? I don't even know who you are!"

"Nice try, but I am not buying it. Now tell me who you are and what you've done to heika or I'll slash you to pieces!"

"If you'd really like to know, I'm Sanzo and I don't know who the hell this 'heika' person is! Why the hell would I kidnap your king in the first place? I don't even know where I am!"

All the noise brought Gwendal to where they were, and when he saw Sanzo he stopped and brought out his sword.

"Who are you? Is he your friend, Günter?"

"No, I don't know who he is either. Last thing I remember I was dragging heika to the library when a blinding light appeared from nowhere and then this man appeared and heika's gone!"

"What did you do to him? Speak, or I'll kill you."

"Like hell I know. I keep telling you, I don't even know where I am!"

Gwendal then went over to him and grabbed his arm. "Fine then, prisoner, you are coming with us."

Sanzo pointed his gun on Gwendal's head. "Who says I'm going anywhere with you? And why the hell am I a prisoner?"

"Gwendal, be careful! We don't know what that weapon is!" Günter warned.

"What do you mean, you don't know what this weapon is? What are you guys anyway?"

"Like we're telling you. Gwendal, take him away." They then heard a sharp bang sound coming from the direction of the stranger.

"What was that?"

"It's my shoreijyu, so let me go or I won't miss next time." Sanzo had fired his gun into the air.

"We can't do that. We have to inter-"

Sanzo fired a shot in Günter's direction, which narrowly missed his face by inches. His hair, though, was cut.

"Wh-what the hell?"

"I am not coming with you. I want to know where the fuck this place is and what I am doing here and where my companions are!"

* * *

Meanwhile, the remaining members of the Sanzo-ikkou had no luck in finding Sanzo. They were about to give up when they noticed an unconscious body lying down on where Sanzo used to stand.

"Why, fucking hell, it's a kid!" Gojyo exclaimed while investigating the boy.

"Huh? But what's he doing here? And he's human, too." Goku asked no one in particular.

"Now, now, please stay back, guys, we need to give him some air." Hakkai instructed while examining the boy for injuries. He was relieved to find there were none, when the boy stirred and woke up.

"Huh? What is this place? And who are you guys?" Yuuri asked while getting up.

"You don't know where this place is?" Gojyo asked, surprised.

"No… the last thing I remember, Günter was dragging me to the library and then there was a blinding light from nowhere, and then the next thing I knew I woke up and I saw your faces."

"Günter? Library? Sorry, kid, we don't know what you're talking about. Libraries are in town, which is pretty far from here. Who's the Günter person? Your parent?" Gojyo asked one thing after another.

"No, he's my teacher. Anyway, where is this place and who are you guys? I'm Yuuri Shibuya."

"Hello, Yuuri-kun. I'm Cho Hakkai, this is Son Goku, and he is Sha Gojyo. This place is called Togenkyou." Hakkai introduced while pointing to his two companions.

"Togenkyou? You mean, this is not Shin Makoku?"

"Shin Makoku? We've never heard of a place with a name like that."

"You mean this is another world? Oh man… I really should ask Ulrike-san about this…"

"Anyway, would you know where Sanzo is? He was with us but he disappeared into thin air."

"Sanzo? I don't know who he is."

"You don't? Wow, so you are really not from around here." Goku remarked.

"I guess so. Anyway, would you know why I am here?"

"Honestly, we are just as clueless as you are, Yuuri-kun. You see, Sanzo's our leader, and then he disappeared into thin air just as we were fighting demons."

"Demons? Do you mean mazokus? Are you guys humans?"

"Why, no. We're all half humans."

"Really? I never would have guessed. I guess you chose to side with the humans, huh? If so, then you should be killing me, then."

"Huh? Why should we?"

"I'm half human too, but I decided to side with the mazokus." _In fact, I'm their king. _Yuuri added quietly.

"We didn't choose to side with the humans or demons. It's just that if we don't kill them, they'll kill us."

"Really? So you really don't know anything about me?"

"Huh? What about you?"

"I'm a double black, and I'm wearing pure black clothes."

"Yes, but double blacks are common here in this world. And besides, it's common for people to wear pure black sometimes."

"Ah, I see. So this really must be a different world."

"Hey, now that I notice it, you said you're half human, right?" Gojyo asked.

"Yes…"

"How come you're not wearing any limiters? And are you dyeing your hair and putting contact lens on?"

"No, it's my natural hair and eye color. And what are limiters?"

"But half humans should have red hair and eyes, unless they were turned into a demon and are wearing limiters…"

This is going to be harder to explain than they thought…

**End of chapter**

A/N: So how did you like it? Please read and review… I need five positive reviews in order to inspire me to update! If you wanna know who's behind this, you have to follow the story… XD


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: No comment…

**The Stoic Maoh and the Wimpy Sanzo Priest?**

**Togenkyou**

"Ah, I get it… So limiters are used to control demonic energy in this world, and people born between a human and a demon has red eyes and red hair… Amazing. In my world, or at least, in the world I'm ruling, demons, or mazokus, look just like humans." Yuuri repeated after the Sanzo-ikkou (minus the Sanzo) explained everything to him.

"Well, this world is different. We're traveling towards west to stop the revival of the Demon King named Gyumaoh who was sealed five hundred years ago by a powerful god, because it has been causing this so called minus wave." Hakkai explained further.

"M… Minus… wave?"

"It's a negative aura surrounding the whole of Togenkyou. It's causing demons, who have peacefully coexisted with humans, to run berserk and attack their human companions. We have been informed that this particular aura was being caused by the forbidden mixing of Black Magic and Science."

"Black Magic and Science? I didn't even know Black Magic ever existed… How do you mix those two?"

"We don't know; nobody has ever tried it, except for those trying to revive the said Demon king."

"You know, I really find all of these hard to believe… Anyway, you guys are all half humans, right?"

"Yeah, I guess you could say that…"

"So does that mean you chose to be humans?"

"Eh? We never chose anyone's side. It's just that we were ordered to go to the west and stop the revival, and along the way are assassins being sent from the west to try to kill us."

"I see… Since you're all half humans, you don't have maryoku, right?"

"Maryoku? What's that?"

"It's kind of like… a power to control one of the elements wind, water, fire or earth given to those who are born of a pure demonic heritage. They say I'm an exception because I was chosen to be a Maou."

"Ah, well… Such things don't exist in this world. Even pure demons don't have those. And what is this you're saying that you're a Maou?"

"I'm a demon king in the world I came from, or at least the world I'm ruling, which is Shin Makoku, but I was just an ordinary fifteen year old high school student who was flushed down a toilet by some bullies then I accidentally went to their world."

"Ah, I see… I guess that's different from the Demon King here." Just then, some rustling was heard from behind the bushes.

"Oooh, guess more assassins are sent to kill us." Gojyo remarked while summoning his shakujo.

"Oh, gimme a break. I just fought a batch of them a while ago and I'm so hungry!" Goku whined.

"Stay back, Yuuri-kun. I don't think you can defend yourself." Hakkai cautioned. "You can jump in our jeep over there."

"I'll be fine if I can use maryoku, but I don't think I can." Yuuri remarked while running to the jeep. Hakuryu 'kyuued', much to Yuuri's surprise.

"D-d-did t-t-the j-jeep j-just… cooed?" Yuuri stuttered while jumping out.

Hakkai saw his nervousness, so he explained while firing chi blasts, "Hakuryu is a dragon that can transform into a jeep. Don't be afraid."

"Really? Now I've seen everything." Yuuri then returned inside the jeep and watched the ikkou fight.

* * *

**Shin Makoku**

Meanwhile, Sanzo had calmed down (or at least, as calm a mood that can be expected from the priest) and had just followed Gwendal and Günter to a room after they said that they will explain everything. Once they got to the room, Sanzo sat on the chair in the middle of the room. Gwendal sat on the opposite side, while Günter kept watch by the door.

"Now, tell me where the fuck I am and where my companions are." Sanzo asked gruffly.

"You're in Shin Makoku and you arrived alone. You didn't have any companions."

Sanzo stood up abruptly, therefore sending his chair tumbling on the floor, and banged his fist on the table. "Don't fucking joke with me! I was in Togenkyou a while ago fighting demons and heading west! Don't you fucking invent names, old man!"

Gwendal twitched at the 'old man' part, but he managed to keep his temper in check. "We're not inventing things. Wedon't even know how _you_ got here in the first place. If you think I'm lying, look around; is this environment familiar to you?"

"No." Sanzo answered flatly.

"It isn't, because it isn't the world you came from. This is Shin Makoku, the land where humans and mazokus are constantly at war. You, a stranger from who knows where, just appeared here without us knowing how. On top of that, our Maou disappeared right after you came."

"Maou? You mean demon king? So YOU are the guys attempting to revive Gyumaoh! Don't you fucking lie to me; this is Hotou Castle in Tenjiku!"

"Gyumaoh? Hotou Castle? Tenjiku? What nonsense are you blabbing about?"

"Don't you fucking pretend you don't know anything! I was sent by the Sanbutsushin to defeat those who are trying to revive the demon king Gyumaoh! And you are those guys!"

"You have a very foul mouth." Günter remarked.

"Don't you freaking change the topic here! I'm here, so I might as well kill all of you and go back to the East."

"Why in the world would you like to kill us?" Günter asked

"Just as I said, you're the felons who are trying to mix Black Magic and Science to revive Gyumaoh, therefore sending this so called minus wave to make the demons go berserk and attack the humans!"

"We don't really know what nonsense you're blabbing about; true, we are at war with humans, but demons have not gone berserk. You are actually standing on demon, or should I say, mazoku territory right now. This is Blood Pledge Castle in Shin Makoku, the capital. I've told you everything, so stop with this Gyumaoh nonsense because our demon king, the Maou, is named Yuuri, and no one is trying to revive any demon king because our king is fifteen years old and alive and healthy!" Günter finished hotly, practically screaming.

Sanzo, who still couldn't believe his ears, decided to check the environment to see if what they're saying is true, but was stopped by Gwendal. Sanzo turned around, glared at him and declared fiercely, "Let me go or I'll put a bullet through your sorry face."

"We're not letting you go until you tell us your story. We told you ours, so tell us yours."

Sanzo reluctantly picked up the chair and sat down. "I came from a shitty world called Togenkyou, where the fucking demons have gone berserk and attacked humans. I was called by the Sanbutsushin, those fucking deities up there who do nothing but watch us lowly creatures suffer, to go on a stupid fucking journey to the west with three other freaking pain in the head idiots to stop the fucking people who were trying to revive the demon king, Gyumaoh, that had been sealed five hundred years ago. This stupid revival forced our sorry butts to go to the west because it was causing this thing called minus wave, which made the fucking demons go crazy and attack the humans. It was believed by those sorry deities up there to have been caused by the forbidden mixing of Black Magic and Science, so we had to go to fucking Tenjiku to fucking murder the sorry party who was trying to revive that fucking Gyumaoh and bring peace to the world. Personally, I don't care about the fucking world. I just wanna avenge my master and kill those sorry lot for killing him and taking the Seiten Sutra, one of the founding scriptures of heaven and earth believed to have been used by the fucking deities up there to create the world, and return to the East and fucking live the rest of my shitty life." Sanzo explained fully, albeit with a 'little bit' of swearing every now and then.

"How can you swear a lot?" Günter asked incredulously.

"Tch. None of your fucking business. Anyway, since I told you everything, just freaking let me go and see if you are telling the truth." Sanzo then stood up and went to the door. Günter prepared to take his sword out, but Gwendal waved to him to put down his sword.

"But Gwendal…" Günter started to protest.

"Let him go. He won't do any harm." Gwendal said without explaining.

"How do you know that?"

"He seems to be telling the truth, but we have no way of confirming it. So, we should trust him. If he turned out to be lying, we'll kill him."

"Wait, you said this demon territory?" Sanzo remarked.

"Yeah, what about it?"

"So how come you can't smell if I'm a demon or not? I'll have you know, I'm a human." Sanzo said with a sarcastic smirk on his face.

"There are humans who chose to side with us, so we have no problem if you're a human or not."

"I don't ever remember saying I sided with you."

"Well… I believe you won't do anything harsh, anyway."

"There's just one freaking thing bothering me."

"What?"

"Where are your limiters? You claim to be demons, but I don't see anything on you that can be limiters."

"What limiters?"

"Things that make you look human and seal your demonic powers. Don't tell me you don't fucking know that."

"No, because in this world mazokus look just like humans."

"Then how do you know if who you're seeing is a demon or not?"

"Demons can use maryoku. It's an ability that allows us to control one of the four elements: wind, water, fire, or earth. Humans and half humans don't have this ability, in exception to the Maou. Also, pure demons can't use maryoku in human territory in exception to the Maou, and demons experience quite a lot of pain when exposed to houseki, the stone that humans use to contrast our maryoku."

_(A/N: Did I get that name, 'houseki', right? If I remember correctly, that was the stone being mined by the women in Suberera in the Mateki episodes, when Yuuri was looking for the magical flute or something that was called Mateki, which, if I remember correctly, was stolen by Geigen Huber Brischella von Voltaire? I don't exactly remember… Oh, and the Geigen dude is somehow related to Gwen, right? I think his cousin or whatever…)_

"So you're saying your Maou is half human?"

"Yes."

"Ah, he must be a taboo, then."

"What do you mean?"

"Union between humans and demons is forbidden. The children born between these two entities have red hair and red eyes."

"Our Maou is a double black."

"It may be possible he's dyeing his hair and using contact lenses. Most taboos are ashamed of the color of their hair and eyes, so they hide it through that."

"Well, half humans here aren't born with red hair and eyes like in your world or something. They simply take after the traits of their parents, demon or human."

"What he's saying is true. I have a half brother that's half human, and he has brown eyes and brown hair."

"Okay, whatever… So, can I fucking go now?" Sanzo closed curtly.

"Yes. I'll show you around." Günter offered.

"Hn."

* * *

**Togenkyou**

After defeating the demons, the three hopped in the jeep and headed west. Gojyo sat up front, Hakkai drove (as usual), and Yuuri and Goku sat in the back.

"Wow, that was amazing, how you beat those many demons just by yourselves… And you were fast too!" Yuuri remarked. He was beginning to like them now.

"Feh, it was nothing, kid… It was just a weak demon party sent to us from the west." Gojyo remarked nonchalantly, albeit with a hint of pride in his voice.

"Hmmm… Sorry I can't be of any help…" Yuuri apologized.

"Don't worry, Yuuri-kun, we're used to all of those anyway… Oh yeah, everyone, we may have to camp out tonight."

"What? That means not enough food, no bed, and worse, being right next to the kappa!" Goku protested.

"You think I want sleep beside you guys? I want women… Liquor… cigarettes…" Gojyo protested as well.

"Such materialistic men… Don't worry, it's just for tonight. We'll arrive at the next town tomorrow."

"Yes!"

"Are you okay with that, Yuuri-kun?" Hakkai asked kindly while looking at Yuuri's face from the rearview mirror.

"Yes, I'm fine with that. Thank you for worrying about me, Hakkai-san." Yuuri replied with a smile.

"You're welcome. We need to figure out how to get you back to your world, though."

"Yeah. And we gotta find that stinkin' monk and sit his superior ass back here on the front seat again." Gojyo remarked.

**End of chapter**

A/N: I hoped you enjoyed reading! You have to follow the story to find out who's behind all of these… Number of reviews needed: 3… Thanks! XD


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: It's vacation, but I wrote this thing like, last school year... Review, people! I can't update unless you review!

**The Stoic Maou and the Wimpy Sanzo Priest?**

**Togenkyou**

"We're almost to the next town, everyone." Hakkai announced.

"Finally! If we had to camp out for another night without women I swear I'm going to turn gay…" Gojyo remarked with a smirk.

"It was just one night, you stupid cockroach! And keep your perverted fantasies to yourself!" Goku remarked.

"What did you call me, you stupid monkey?" Gojyo asked challengingly upfront while glaring at Goku in the rearview mirror.

"I called you cockroach because you're a cockroach, cockroach!" Goku answered back.

"I dare you to repeat that!" Gojyo stood up from his seat.

"Cockroach, cockroach, cockroach! There, you satisfied now?" Goku also stood up.

"You're really begging for your life, are you?"

"No, I'm begging for _your _life!"

"Oh yeah? You're dead, monkey!"

"Oh dear… Sanzo could have at least left his harisen behind. Oh well, I guess I have no choice." The driver remarked.

"Eh? What do you mean, Hakkai-san?" Yuuri curiously asked while watching the two idiots fight.

"Hold on tight, Yuuri-kun!" Hakkai then made a sharp turn, which resulted in the two idiots who were standing in their seat fall out. Goku and Gojyo ran to the now halted jeep, cursing all the while.

"What did you do that for, Hakkai? You could have killed us back there, damn it!" Gojyo protested while getting in.

"Yeah, Hakkai! What's the big deal?"

"Well, I just figured I couldn't watch over two rowdy boys and drive, so I decided to get rid of the rowdy boys and just drive. So, if you two don't behave yourselves, I'm going to make you walk to the next town while carrying your luggage. You wouldn't want that, would you?" Hakkai warned with his ever so present smile, which scared the crap out of the two.

"No, mommy." Gojyo murmured.

"Oh? It seems I heard a 'yes please' from you, eh, Gojyo?" Hakkai commented, the smile never once fading away.

"Me? Uh, I didn't say anything…" Gojyo replied, feigning innocence.

Meanwhile, Yuuri continued to laugh in the back, which earned suspicious looks from the three. When Yuuri got hold of his surroundings, he wiped his eyes and spoke.

"I-I'm so sorry… It's just that you guys are so funny!" Yuuri laughingly remarked.

"We're a joy, aren't we? I'm glad you liked our little act, Yuuri-kun." Hakkai said, _still _smiling. "Well, shall we continue to the west _peacefully_, guys?"

"Yeah, sure, Hakkai." The two said in unison.

* * *

**Shin Makoku**

Sanzo had just finished scouting the whole castle, and was forced to accept that they were telling the truth.

"Damn it… How do I fucking get back to my world now?" Sanzo remarked while taking a seat in one of the benches in the gardens. Günter sat beside him.

"I think we can help you with that. We can ask Ulrike-san to send you back to your own world. She can pray to Shinou-sama to send you back."

"Like that will ever happen. The only ones who can send me back are the gods… Wait a minute, maybe one of those fucking deities are the cause of all of these!" Sanzo then fired a bullet into the sky, although aware that it does not make any difference.

In the distant heavens, a certain goddess sneezed… But putting that aside…

Sanzo stood up and began to walk away, but Günter held him by the hand.

"Sanzo-san, if you want, we can offer you sleeping quarters here in the castle until we find a way to return you to your own world and get our Maou back."

"Hn." Sanzo then followed him to Yuuri's room, when he collided with a smaller noble with blonde hair. Said noble cursed and picked himself up and looked up at cold violet eyes.

"Huh? Günter, who is he?" The noble asked.

"Ah, Wolfram, I forgot. This is Sanzo-san; he is going to stay with us until he goes back to his own world."

"Own world? Günter, what nonsense are you blabbing about this time? And where's Yuuri?"

"That's the problem. We think he might have switched worlds with this gentleman."

"What? I demand an explanation for all of these!"

"You have to ask that from Gwendal."

Wolfram then glared at Sanzo, who glared at him in return. Wolfram was shocked; Sanzo had such a stony look that it looked like there was nothing behind those pretty violet eyes but ice.

"What the hell are you glaring for, you brat?" Sanzo snapped.

"Who are you calling a brat?" Wolfram shot back.

"I'll have you know: Those who answer back to me never lived another day longer, so I suggest you to be more respectful next time when you answer me, brat." Sanzo warned.

"Oh yeah? Let's see now who'll die, shall we?"

"Are you challenging me?" Sanzo then brought his gun out from his sleeve and pointed it at the smaller blonde.

"Beings that make up the element of fire… Obey this brave ma-mppph!!-" Wolfram began to chant his maryoku, but Günter covered his mouth in time.

"Wolfram! Behave properly and go to Gwendal for explanations, will you?" Günter scolded. Wolfram snatched Günter's hand from his mouth.

"Tch. Mind your own business." Wolfram then stomped away.

Turning to Sanzo, Günter said, "I'm sorry about that, Sanzo-san. He's Gwendal's younger half brother, Wolfram von Bielefeld."

"Hn. I don't care. Just tell that brat to stay away from me if he wants to live." Sanzo then began to walk ahead of Günter.

"No, Sanzo-san! This way!"

* * *

**Togenkyou**

Hakkai and the others have arrived in town, much to everybody's relief.

"Now, now, everybody," Hakkai gathered them up to make an announcement of some sort. "I understand you want to do the usual things, but I have to remind you to watch your spending because we have to live from our own money."

"Eh? Hakkai, what do you mean?"

"I mean, Sanzo's credit card is with him, so we have to find work and spend our money wisely."

"What? So that means…" Goku started, but was cut off by Hakkai.

"Yes, Goku, so that means you can't eat the usual amount you used to eat when Sanzo is with us."

"What? But I was looking forward to having meat buns…"

"In that case, you have to find a job. I believe we may have to stay in this town for a while to earn money to continue our journey. Since Sanzo isn't here to tell us when we're going to leave, I guess we have to stay and earn some money to sustain ourselves."

"Is the Maten Kyomon with Sanzo too?" Goku asked.

"I believe it is, and so are the harisen, shoreijyu, and the credit card. So that means we can't tolerate wasteful spending."

"I get the monkey's point. If the Maten Kyomon is with baldy, that means we have no reason to continue to the west."

"But Gojyo, we still need to stop the minus wave, remember? Or must I enlighten your mind on what we're supposed to do? And besides, Sanzo may come back and switch places with Yuuri-kun again."

"Huh? How do you know Sanzo is in the kid's world?" Gojyo asked

"He might be, after all, where else would he be transported? And we all know the demons did not kidnap him."

"Yeah, I guess you got a point there. Well, I'm off to gambling to earn us some cheese." Gojyo then walked away and waved.

"I'm gonna go look for some other job." Goku ran off to the opposite direction.

"I have to look for a job too. Yuuri-kun, are you okay staying in the inn by yourself?"

"I want to help too. I can look for a job as well." Yuuri offered.

"But it isn't your mission to go west. Besides, we don't want to burden you with our problem."

"Oh, but it's really okay, Hakkai-san. Since you're protecting me anyway, I might as well help you out too until I return to my own world."

"Okay, then I guess there's no changing your mind. Thank you, Yuuri-kun."

"You're welcome. I'll bring the luggage and Hakuryu to the inn, and then I'll go find a job."

"Okay."

**End of Chapter**

A/N: What do you think? And I gave a clue on the one who's behind these in this chapter… You have to read carefully to know what it is! Number of reviews needed: 2. Thanks! XD


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Please enjoy reading and please leave a review! Number of reviews needed: 2. Thanks! XD

**The Stoic Maou and the Wimpy Sanzo Priest?**

**Shin Makoku**

Once directed to his room, Sanzo removed his robes, rolled up his sutra, and put his gun down on a nearby bedside table. He then flopped down on the bed to just stare at the ceiling.

_Damn it, just what fucking situation have I gotten myself in? And isn't there anything to do around here? I really have to ask for a newspaper or something… _He then went to the window to just stare outside._ The credit card's with me. Those idiots must be working their butts fuckingly hard now. Hah, serves them right. That's what they get for depending on my credit card so much…_

He then went out of the room to ask someone for a newspaper. He wanted to smoke on the way, but he found his box empty, so he decided to get smokes as well. _I'm out of damn cigarettes. I have to make them get me some._

After a few minutes of searching, Sanzo finally found Günter walking down the hallway. "Oi, Günter!"

Günter then turned around, and to his surprise he saw Sanzo. "Sanzo-san, what is it?"

"I want a newspaper, and cigarettes. Get them."

"I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about."

"What do you mean you don't know what I'm talking about? I want a newspaper and cigarettes now!"

"Well, such things don't exist in this world, Sanzo-san." Günter calmly explained.

Sanzo went to him and grabbed his collar. "Well, I suggest it's time to invent, don't you think? If I don't get it I'm going on a killing rampage until I get back to my own fucking world!"

"Did someone just say, 'invent'?" A familiar woman's voice asked from the far end of the hallway. Günter shuddered, knowing to whom the voice belonged to; it was Anissina, in other words: DOOM.

Günter then pried himself from Sanzo's hand and ran in the opposite direction. He barely got to the end of the hallway when Anissina appeared.

"Ah, you must be Sanzo-san, am I right?" She remarked.

"So what if I am?"

"I've heard a lot about you. Anyway, what did you say about inventing something?"

"Anissina, don't go bothering guests." Gwendal suddenly appeared out of nowhere.

"Gwendal! You're just in time! I'm dying to let you test something!"

"Yeah, well, I'm not available. Günter is in the library if you want to know."

"Oh, fine. Anyway, thanks for telling me where Günter is!" Anissina then ran to the library.

"Who is that woman?" Sanzo asked.

"She's Anissina von Khrennikov. She's an inventor."

"..."

* * *

**Togenkyou**

After a hard day's work, the ikkou and Yuuri met in the inn.

"How did everyone go?" Hakkai asked pleasantly. "I got a job as a teacher. Just like the old days."

"I got pretty lucky today. I earned us about 230,000 yen." Gojyo proudly said. "The women in this town are beautiful, so it was nothing for me."

_(A/N: You know, those goddess of luck crap talks he always uses to seduce women into siding with him? Oh, and my dad said that one dollar is equal to a hundred fifteen yen…)_

"I got a job as an inn watcher something." Goku said.

"I got a job as a waiter." Yuuri said.

"Well, I guess that will be enough to keep us going for a while. How much did everybody earn today?"

"2300 yen." Goku said while handing the money to Hakkai.

"I told you, 230,000 yen." Gojyo remarked proudly while handing the money to Hakkai as well.

"2875 yen." Yuuri handed in the money as well.

"Ah, I earned 7475 yen today, so if I add all of it, it will make…" Hakkai paused for a minute to do the calculation in his head. "242,650 yen. Not bad for the first day."

_(A/N: I don't really know about the salary stuff in Japan –or Togenkyou, for that matter- so I just invented figures…)_

"Okay, let me budget this and we'll go out for dinner." Hakkai closed while going to his room.

"Good timing! I'm getting so hungry…" Goku then went to his room.

"Damn it… All because that corrupt monk didn't at least leave his credit card with us that I can't get laid! Sheesh, why do girls have to cost a lot of money anyway…?" Gojyo annoyingly remarked while returning to his own room as well. Yuuri remained silent and retired to his room.

Gojyo sat on his bed and pondered for a moment._ I wonder how that corrupt monk's doing. Where in fucking hell is he anyway? Hmmph, the nerve of that guy. He manages to make everybody worry about him! Anyway, I shouldn't be sitting here musing over that corrupt monk… I swear I'm going to smack that monk in the face for making us worry so much when he gets back. Or if he does get back. _Gojyo shook his head_. He will go back. The fucking monk's inhumanely strong, after all…_

Once in his room, Hakkai got out a pen, a calculator, and a paper. _Let's see… 2300 yen for the inn, 575 yen for cigarettes, knowing Goku it must be 11500 for food, 5750 for supplies when we get back on the road, and… That's about it. So we have… 222,525 yen left. Not bad._ Hakkai then lay down on his bed to rest for a minute. _I wonder how Sanzo's doing? I hope he's alright…._ Goku's shouting brought him back to reality._ Oh dear, I have to go feed the children now… _Hakkai chuckled to himself and went down the stairs.

* * *

**Shin Makoku**

Sanzo just settled for reading the books he found at the library, but he still couldn't sit still. His nicotine cravings are getting higher by the minute, to the point that he can't take it anymore and went out on a tear outside the library. Gwendal and Günter tried to stop him, but they couldn't. A few minutes later, Wolfram happened to pass by. He got a bucket of water from the kitchen and splashed it on Sanzo, which brought him back to reality.

"What the hell did you do that for, you brat?" Sanzo asked hotly while pointing his gun at him.

"I splashed it on you to get you to calm down. You have to get used to life here."

"Why you… Fine. I'm fucking returning to my room, and if anybody disturbs me, they're dead."

"Like hell we're disturbing you. If I could I'd let you rot in prison."

Sanzo clicked the safety switch thingy off his gun threateningly. "What did you say…?"

"Wolfram! Go somewhere will you?!" Günter scolded.

"Humph!" Wolfram turned on his heels and marched down the hallway. Sanzo stomped in the opposite direction and went back to his quarters.

That night, one of the maids knocked on Sanzo's door. Receiving a grunt in reply, Doria assumed it was alright and opened the door, but to her surprise Sanzo pointed a metal thing at her.

"I don't remember saying you could open the door."

"I-I'm sorry, Sanzo-sama, but Gwendal-sama told me to bring you food."

"Tch. Just put it there and get out."

"Y-yes…" Doria hastily set the dinner on the table in the corner of the room and hurried outside.

_Damn people… Why can't they just leave me be?_ Sanzo let out a long, disgusted, and angry sigh. _I'd even settle for one of the kappa's shitty sticks now…Damn, I really need something to hit before I completely lose my mind!! _Sanzo then snapped out of his thoughts and went to eat the food, which was surprisingly good.

* * *

**Togenkyou**

"Give the dumpling back, you cockroach!" Goku protested. "That was the last one!"

"So? First come, first serve!"

"But I was saving that for last! Spit it out!"

"And if I do, you'll eat it?"

"Eww, stop grossing me out!"

"Oh dear… I really do hope Sanzo could have at least left the harisen behind…" Hakkai remarked while rubbing his temple.

"Do they always fight like this, Hakkai-san?" Yuuri asked.

"Yes, and usually our leader, Sanzo, smacks them with the harisen or shoots the gun at them and yells for them to be quiet."

"Well, what do you do?"

"Usually when we're in the jeep, I do a sharp turn or something similar, but now… I don't know what to do to break them up."

"How about shouting at them?"

"Oh no, I'm not good at that." Finally deciding that Gojyo and Goku had gone too far, Hakkai spoke up calmly with a smile on his face, "Please stop fighting, Gojyo and Goku, or I will have to throw you out the restaurant and beat you to death. You wouldn't like that, ne?"

_(A/N: A little exaggerated here…)_

Goku and Gojyo immediately clung to each other. "Ahhh, Hakkai, I'm sorry!" They said in unison.

"Good. Now please behave yourselves and eat properly like modest gentlemen and I won't do it. Is that clear?"

Gojyo and Goku nodded vigorously and stuffed their mouths. Yuuri laughed.

"On the contrary, Hakkai-san, it seems to me like you know how to handle these situations properly."

"Oh, that? It's kind of normal, actually. If it got worse, well… Only one person can stop them."

"Oi, Kappa! Stop snatching things off my plate!"

"Your plate? That's everybody's share, you idiot!"

"Well, the waitress put it in front of me!"

"Oh dear, here we go again. I guess I have to use a different approach." Turning to the two, Hakkai stood up and cracked his knuckles. "You two have been very bad boys. I think it's time for proper punishment now, ne?" A still smiling Hakkai then dragged the struggling two out of the restaurant to who knows where. A few minutes later, Hakkai returned.

"Hakkai-san, what did you do to them?"

"Oh, I just tied them to a tree overnight. They'll learn." Hakkai replied, the everlasting smile never fading.

"Urhm… Don't you think that's a little too extreme, Hakkai-san…?"

"I'll put blankets over them so they won't get a cold, but I am not healing their stiff necks and backs in the morning. Seriously, it's hard disciplining such rowdy boys."

They both laughed.

* * *

**Tenkai**

Somewhere in the distant heavens, a certain goddess with a passion for anything fun sat by her usual spot: the water lily pond thing where she can view the happenings in both worlds.

"Look, Jiroushin." Kanzeon Bosaetsu pointed to the pond. "Isn't that Maou guy just cute when he's with the three of them? He looks sooo innocent…"

"Kanzeon Bosaetsu! Do you even realize what you're doing? You're interrupting the journey to the west to stop Gyumaoh's revival! On top of that, you sabotaged a world that doesn't even have anything to-"

"Relax, Jiroushin." Kanzeon Bosaetsu cut in. "The journey can wait. And besides, I didn't 'sabotage' anything in Shin Makoku. I merely wanted to have some fun. At last, with all the boring things put aside… Tell me how you cope with this, Konzen, especially since you're going to do again in Shin Makoku what you have been doing five hundred years ago…"

"Kanzeon Bosaetsu! You don't mean…"

"Oh, but I do… Konzen will go back to signing paperwork."

"Kanzeon Bosaetsu, this is too much! We can't delay the journey any further!"

"Whatever… What's a few months, anyway? I'll return them to their own worlds when I want to."

"Kanzeon Bosaetsu!"

"Whatever, Jiroushin. The ikkou is still going to journey west anyway. I'll bring him back when they're in Tenjiku. Besides, Konzen can use a little break once in a while…"

**End of Chapter**

A/N: Some break, I'd say. What kind of a break is it when you have to sign paperwork? Anyway, please read and review!


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: And here is the next chappie!! Yay! Yahoooooooo!! I'm sooooo happy coz I finally get to read all of the Tsubasa mangas soon! But anyway, here's the next installation!

**The Stoic Maou and the Wimpy Sanzo Priest?**

**Tenjiku**

"Where is the Sanzo-ikkou now, Ni?" Gyoukumen Kousho asked the deranged former Sanzo. Ni Jen Yi just smiled.

"They are continuing to the west as usual, Gyoukumen Kousho-sama, but you see, there are minor changes."

"And what are those?"

"It seems that our Sanzo-ikkou had lost their Sanzo… and they are now traveling with a black haired kid."

"WHAAAAT?!" Gyoukumen Kousho thundered. WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!"

"I don't know either, Gyoukumen Kousho-sama. It seems like the gods have interfered."

"How can you not know?! Get out of my sight and call Kougaiji in here."

"As you wish." Kougaiji then entered.

"What do you want now, bitch?" Kougaiji hotly demanded. Gyoukumen smiled.

"Oh, Kougaiji… Is that a way to talk to your stepmother?"

"What the hell do you want?" Kougaiji asked again, ignoring his stepmother's words.

"I want you to find out where Sanzo had disappeared to and who the black haired kid is. If he turns out to be someone powerful or someone that will aid them, I want you to kill him. Is that clear?"

"Whatever." Kougaiji stomped out of the room. He then met Yaone, Dokugakuji, and Lirin.

"The bitch wants us to do something again. It seems like Sanzo disappeared, and a black haired kid stood in his place."

"What are our orders, Kou?" Dokugakuji asked.

"It's to find out who that kid is and also where Sanzo is. Also, if the kid is someone powerful, she wants us to kill him."

"Do you also want to find out if the Sanzo-ikkou has the sutra, Kougaiji-sama?" Yaone spoke up.

"… I don't know. She didn't say anything about it. Might as well do."

"Okay then!" But Lirin pulled Kougaiji's shirt.

"What about me, Onii-chan?" Lirin asked expectantly.

"You'll stay here." Kougaiji said while patting Lirin's head. Lirin pouted.

"But I'm old and strong enough to defend myself! Besides, I get sooo bored here, so pleeeeease? Pretty please?" Lirin begged and pleaded, aided with cute little child eyes. Kougaiji sighed. Children's cute eyes are much too hard to resist.

"Fine, fine… You can come, but don't get too feisty, okay?"

"Yay!" They then walked out of the castle and rode on the flying dragons to go to where the Sanzo-ikkou was staying at.

* * *

**Tenkai**

"Uh-oh. I smell trouble, Jiroushin." Kanzeon Bosaetsu told her henchman/servant or whatever he is.

"Kanzeon Bosaetsu! You should bring the Maou back to his own world now or he will be harmed! We can't afford to have a king from another world to get hurt!"

The goddess with a passion for anything fun rolled her eyes. "Relax, Jiroushin. I've carefully planned out my fun. Don't spoil it, ne?" She then began to laugh evilly.

Jiroushin sighed. "Well, at least give the Maou a method to defend himself. You can remove that spell you cast on him that disables him to use his maryoku."

"Whatever. It won't be fun if there isn't a challenge. I have a different plan in mind."

Jiroushin sweat dropped. "And what would that be…?"

Kanzeon smiled slyly. "You'll see."

* * *

**Togenkyou**

"Achooooo!" Goku and Gojyo echoed. Hakkai stifled a laugh.

"Seriously 'Kai, why did you have to tie us to a tree? To be honest I prefer the monk's harisen…" Gojyo remarked disdainfully while sniffing.

"Well, that's what you get if you two don't behave." Hakkai answered, all the while the eternal smile plastered upon his face. "And it seems like putting some blankets on you didn't do any good…" Hakkai added while laughing.

"I really don't like your method of disciplining…" Gojyo said, pretending to shiver. Hakkai and Yuuri laughed.

"You guys are so much fun!" Yuuri remarked with a laugh. "Anyway, when are we going to continue west?"

"Hmmm, I don't know." Hakkai answered thoughtfully while rubbing his chin. "To be quite honest, we haven't earned enough yet, so we have to stay for a bit longer." He looked at the clock. "Anyway, it's almost time for work. Since you two aren't in any position to work today, I suggest you get some sleep, okay? Call me if you need anything. Lunch is in the fridge, just heat it up. I'll see you boys later." With that said, Hakkai and Yuuri went out the house, leaving two sniffing idiots behind.

"I'd rather be smacked upside down the head by Sanzo's harisen…" Goku remarked contemptuously while sniffing.

"Me too." Gojyo agreed. "Achoo!"

* * *

**Shin Makoku**

"Well, don't you think we should at least let him assume the responsibilities of the Maou? If heika comes back, he's gonna have piles and piles of paperwork." Günter was discussing what to do with Sanzo with Gwendal.

"I don't know. He doesn't seem like the guy who has experience with paperwork, and if he doesn't do it right it can create a bigger mess. Besides, he has that metal thing that looks like it can pierce through our body." Gwendal thoughtfully said.

"Then we must teach him the ways of Shin Makoku! He cannot stay here without adapting to our culture… I'm sure he'll be pretty submissive… At least, I think so."

"…Fine. We'll let Conrart train him when he gets back this afternoon." Gwendal then went out of his office and went to find Sanzo.

* * *

**Togenkyou**

_Hmmm, that looks like the Smith and Wesson gun Sanzo uses._ Hakkai thought to himself while passing by a stall on his way home. He decided to go near the stall and look at the gun. "Excuse me, is this a Smith and Wesson gun used to kill demons?" Hakkai asked the stall owner.

"Why yes. You must be pretty adept with guns to know what it's called." The stall owner remarked kindly with a smile.

"How much is it?"

"It's two hundred dollars." The man said.

"I'll take it." When he got home, he was relieved to find Yuuri and the two idiots.

"Welcome home." The three said in unison.

"Thanks. Oh, Yuuri, I bought something for you. I figured you might need it for self defense."

When Yuuri saw it he went bug-eyed. "A gun? What would I need this for?"

"You'll use it so that when demons attack you on your way home so you'll be able to defend yourself."

Yuuri took the gun and examined it. "It _is_ a real gun! But I don't know how to use it, unless it's the same thing they do in action movies…"

"I don't know how to either, but I've observed Sanzo enough that I think I can give it a try." Hakkai said while taking the gun from Yuuri. He pointed it outside the window and shot. A small thud was heard on the ground, then running footsteps, then silence. "Oh dear. I think I've hit something." Hakkai remarked with a smile. They then ran down to look what fell, and to their surprise it was a demon!

"Well, well, well, our friends from the west decided to send assassins once again." Gojyo remarked sarcastically while kicking the dead demon.

"So those running footsteps earlier must have belonged to his allies. All the more for you to be careful, Yuuri-kun."

"I'll try to learn it quickly, Hakkai-san."

* * *

**Tenkai**

"Kanzeon Bosaetsu! Thisis your idea of 'self-defense'? The kid doesn't even know how to use a gun! This is madness!" Jiroushin protested, exasperated.

"Relax, Jiroushin." Kanzeon Bosaetsu said with a yawn. "Do you seriously think you could get a banishing gun from anywhere? I purposely put that stall over there so that dear little Tenpou would pass by it and buy the gun for the cute little Maou. I've planned everything out."

"But Kanzeon Bosaetsu!"

Kanzeon stuck her little finger in her ear. "Whatever, Jiroushin. Just watch and stay quiet for once, will yah?"

* * *

**Still Togenkyou, a section in the forest far from the Sanzo-ikkou's inn**

"You mean to say Sanzo has come back?" Kougaiji asked the demon who reported back to him.

"I'm pretty positive, Kougaiji-sama. One of our men fell because he was shot from the inside of the inn. We quickly ran here to tell you the news."

"You didn't even look? What if that wasn't Sanzo?!" Kougaiji thundered.

"You did say that Sanzo was the only one with the gun in the group, right? So I figured that should be good enough."

Kougaiji calmed down. "Hn. I guess you're right. Get out of my sight, and when you appear before me again be sure to have the sutra."

"Yes, Kougaiji-sama."

* * *

**Shin Makoku**

"WHAT THE HELL?! I AM NOT ABOUT TO SIGN PAPERWORK!" Sanzo's shouting voice thundered across the hallway.

"But you have to understand that we are letting you stay here, so might as well assume the Maou's duties." Günter calmly explained.

"I FUCKING DON'T CARE! I AM NOT DOING IT!" To emphasize his point, Sanzo reached into his robes for his gun, but was surprised to find it gone. Günter held the shiny metal thing up.

"If you're looking for this, Sanzo-san, I suggest you give up." Sanzo charged towards him, but Günter held his sword up to Sanzo's neck. "I suggest you cooperate, Sanzo-san."

Sanzo let out a defeated sigh. "Fine, you fucking fool. But I am fucking getting my gun back." Just then, Conrad came walking down the hallway.

"Oh, Conrart!" Günter shouted to Conrad's walking figure. Conrad came onto view.

"Hello, Günter. Oh, and who is this gentleman?" Conrad indicated Sanzo.

Sanzo slapped his hand away. "Don't touch me."

"Oh, sorry about that. This is Genjyo Sanzo-san. He, we think, has switched worlds with heika."

"Switched worlds?" Conrad echoed, dumbfounded.

"Yeah. He suddenly appeared when Heika disappeared."

"Oh, I see."

"Anyway, I and Gwendal were thinking that you should train him in fencing."

"WHAAAAT?!" Conrad and Sanzo shouted in unison. Günter stared at them, shocked.

"What did I say?"

This was going to be very hard for Sanzo and Yuuri indeed.

**End of Chapter**

A/N: So how was it? Please leave a review…


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